What I Learned From Talking With A Kinship Grandma
In my role as Communications Specialist with Project Belong, I love getting to interview families, youth, volunteers, etc. about the work of caring for vulnerable children. When our Loudoun County Director suggested I chat with Olympia, I was happy to do so.
Olympia was described to me as an inspiring kinship grandmother who attended our annual Abide Retreat for foster, adoptive, and kinship parents.
She’s been connected with a local church in Berryville called Crums UMC, who’s been supporting her with a Care Community, prayer, tangible needs, and more.
However, when I first got on the phone with Olympia, I immediately knew from her rural twang and her absolute frankness that I wasn’t dealing with any ordinary grandma from Northern Virginia.
We chatted about foster care, caring for vulnerable kids, and more — but more importantly, I felt I learned a whole lot more about following God, what faithful generosity can look like, and living each day with daily bread.
Here are some takeaways I had from my conversation with Olympia!
Being thoughtful is good, but we can easily overthink things. Caring for kids in need is nothing to think twice about.
Could you tell me about your experience as a kinship grandmother?
I have three boys - actually they are my great grandchildren. They are 10, 5 and 4 years old.
Did you have any hesitation about bringing them all in?
No, ma'am. There was no hesitation. They were living in Georgia with their mom and she was struggling to cope in her life. And she needed me. So I had CPS put her and the kids on a bus to bring them to me. I just couldn't see my babies going to foster care. There's so many children in foster care, and their parents and family don't ever see them again, they get lost in the system. And I used to be a foster mother.
Oh, you were? Here in Virginia?
Oh, yeah. I was a foster mother years ago. I was living in Stafford County. I would hear these footsteps late at night and look out the window at 2:00 in the morning. There were these little kids running back and forth down to look for their mom, who was really bad on drugs. So I went out to them and said, “What are you all doing here at this time?” They said, “We're looking for our mama.” And I just felt love for them. I took care of them until their mom went to jail. I had them until they went back to Georgia with their father. I used to feed them, we went to the thrift store, got clothes, stuff, made sure they went back to school and everything. I had them for a long time. The oldest daughter, she calls me Mom right today.
2. It doesn’t matter what you do or don’t have. God will provide the means.
Were you ever worried about not having enough space or money or resources?
Let me tell you what happened to me one day. One day, I had four kids who’d come for dinner frequently. But I told them, “You all can't come in today because I have company over.” So they left. And I thought I had just enough for my guests, right? But after they left, the kids came back and sat on the porch. They asked, “Can we have some water?” So when I finished having dinner, I noticed all this food I had left over. And I looked at this food and said, “There's no way I had this food left over.” So the kids outside, I opened the door, I said, “Yeah, come on in here and eat.”
Don't you know God provided enough food for me to feed them? Does that make sense what I'm saying?
It was just like when Jesus had a loaf of bread and the fish, and he fed 5,000 people. It was the same story with me, and I don't know how I had all that food left over, but I had that food left over. It's a miracle, right?
3. $25 could be a quick lunch for some, a miracle for others.
I admire you for trusting in God to provide. I think a lot of people would say, “I don't have enough for myself. How could I provide for others?”
He provides for me. I have miracles. I have testimonies of what God had done for me. And I share my testimonies, and I share my faith, and I share whatever I have. The more I share and give, the more I receive.
One year at Thanksgiving, I had 24 cents in my checking account. I told my daughter, “What are we going to do? I want some cake and ice cream for the kids for Thanksgiving.” We didn't have enough money. So one day, my daughter happened to come in one night. She said, “Mama, here's your mail.” So I was going through the mail and I saw this brown envelope, and I didn't recognize it. It was a card. So I said, “Oh, who's writing me?”
So I opened up the envelope. It was this lady named Sister Brenda from the church and she sent me $25. Wasn’t that something? It was enough money to buy ice cream and a cake and I had money left over! That was a blessing!
4. It’s never too late to find healing in your story.
How was the Abide Retreat? What did you think of it?
I loved it. I wish there were more mothers and more grandmothers that could have attended who’re going through what I'm going through. I love the way they treated me. When they found out that I was a great grandmother, that I raise my great grandboys, I never had to even pour water in my own glass.
When I went to the bar where you go fix your plate - they would take my plate back to my table. All day, I had to just take myself back to the table! Yes, I really enjoyed it. I enjoyed the singing. I enjoyed the speakers.
I got to go and share about the darkness that was back in my mind. It had been back there for years, and I guess I just left it back there. And I told the story about my life, and there was relief from things I didn't know were burdening me.
They were just surprised. And they said, “And you’re still standing?” Yes, I am because of the Almighty! It made me realize when I had my moments where I strayed away from the Lord, that I was being protected by the Lord all this time until I got back into his household. I didn't even know.
5. God orchestrates relationships between the Church, social workers, and community to bring his kingdom here on earth.
The best thing that ever happened to me is when the social worker from the school that the kids go to, he referred me to Miss Jaoni. And Miss Jaoni referred me to this church. And then the church, they said that they wanted to help us.
So I go to Crums Church, and I am happy. I am thankful. I'm grateful for what the Lord has done for me. Now everything they have, I try to involve myself. Tonight I'm going to do a volunteer night to serve dinner for the homeless. I have a lot of sisters there now and a lot of brothers at Crums Church. I'm not alone.
And my son in California, he said, “What you've done all the years for everyone that I can remember, you used to open up your doors for them to come and get food out your refrigerator, get food out your pantry. Look what God has done for you.” He said, “He's just giving you back what you gave.”