How the Church Can Love Both Mom and Baby

What does it truly mean to love them both?

We live in a world that magnifies false dichotomies. We are made to think we must make a choice between supporting the mother or supporting the child. Those in the foster care space might feel like they must choose a side in supporting either the biological or the foster/adoptive family.

As Christians, we’re called to be known for our love & service to both parties. It couldn’t be any clearer than in James 1:27 – “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.”

Birth moms and vulnerable families are a reflection of modern-day widows and orphans. Loving both requires our words, in conjunction with loving actions. Then we can effectively empower women, support families, and cultivate a culture of life in Virginia.

As Her PLAN’s Virginia coordinator, I’ve been encouraged by the vast number of life-affirming assistance providers who are selflessly serving these families each day. Our goal through Her PLAN is to connect and aid these organizations, while connecting them with local partners and churches, to maximize our impact. We must recognize that we are stronger when unified, each focused on serving with excellence in the unique area to which we’ve been called.

For decades, “pro-lifers” have been portrayed as close minded activists. Of course, this is not a true reflection of the heart of our majority, but how do we prove that?

We can only begin untangling these misconceptions when we answer through action. I believe we begin by offering pregnant and parenting moms real, tangible solutions and ensuring they are surrounded by individuals who love well and point to hope. We must build relationships that encourage women, not only to choose life for their baby, but that empower them to take hold of their future and work toward achieving their long term goals.

It’s important to recognize that this journey looks different for everyone. Each person comes to the table with a unique story and struggle. There is no “one size fits all” model for serving moms and vulnerable families.

In response to this, we’ve designed a free directory of life-affirming, comprehensive services covering seven categories of care, each reflective of the varying needs of those in our community. Each category resulted from a study of the seven “abortion triggers,” or most common reasons women give for feeling that abortion was their only option. Whether a mom is seeking care for her children, legal or financial assistance, mental health services or access to safe housing, we want it to make clear who she can trust and where she can turn to receive support.

When the need is this great, it feels overwhelming, which leads many to settle for simply “doing enough.” Yet, there has never been a more important moment for the church to speak up and explore new opportunities to represent the love of Christ to a broken and hurting world.

If you’re unsure of what your “next step” should be and are looking for ideas to reach more women and vulnerable families, I’d encourage you to visit our website or read our Pathways to Life Guide for Virginia. This free resource presents over 100 ideas for local churches, covering all seven categories of care, to deepen involvement in this critical moment.

For the life-affirming safety net to continue to grow, we must identify those who are faithfully serving, build bridges to maximize our impact, and creatively seek opportunities to fill the care gaps illuminated throughout the process. This is how we can truly help them both and cultivate a culture of life in Virginia, where women are empowered, children are safe, and families can thrive.

Allie LaCourse is the Virginia Coordinator at Her PLAN, whose mission is to facilitate collaboration among providers and their communities to empower women and families through comprehensive medical, social, and material support. Allie works to increase awareness and use of the Her PLAN directory and Pathways to Life Guide and connects individual assistance providers with state and national resources. Her background in social work, as well as her personal experience with foster care & adoption, ignited a passion for inspiring those in her community to come together as we seek to serve & empower vulnerable women and children in Virginia.